Thursday, June 9, 2011

How to Know if You Are Insane

Ever wonder how insane you truly are?   It's not black and white - people can be just a tad bit batty or they can be completely loco.  If you would like to know, take this scientifically accurate quiz to determine the extent of your insanity:

For every "yes", give yourself a point.  At the end, add up your points to discover whether or not you should admit yourself to a psychiatric ward.

Give yourself a point if you have ever....

1.  Asked the question, "are you real?"

2.  Walked down the stairs of your house holding a completely random inanimate object over your head, ready to strike at the murderer that you are 100% sure is waiting to kill you because you heard a sound, and found that your house is empty.  Except for you, of course.  If this has happened to you, you probably are more dangerous than the imaginary murderer, anyhow.

3.  Talked to yourself.

4.  Talked to yourself in a foreign accent.

5.  Talked to yourself in a foreign accent while yelling at the top of your lungs.

6.  Tried dog food to see how it tasted.

7.  Tried dog food to see how it tasted and found that you quite enjoyed it.

8.  Started cracking up in a silent place like a church, library, or standardized exam testing center for no obvious reason.

9.  Thought you saw a small animal running across the floor, and realized it really wasn't there.

10.  Screamed for no reason.

11.  Been told by your neighbors that "your dog is quite the barker" and you don't own a dog.

12.  Seriously considered checking your DNA to see if you were a robot.

13.  Assumed that "Paranormal Activity" was an actual documentary.

14.  Yelled random names at complete strangers to see if you could correctly guess their name.

15.  Blamed an inanimate object for something that you probably did.

15.  Ridden a unicorn. 

16.  Lost sleep worrying about an upcoming zombie apocalypse.

17.  Thought that Arkansas was pronounced phonetically.

18.  Believed that Santa Claus was real up until high school.

19.  Just wept silently while reading #18.

20.  Taken a quiz titled "How to Know if You Are Insane".

If you answered 0-3 as "yes":

You are surprisingly normal.  Go eat some pie, you deserve it.

If you answered 4-9 as "yes":

You are a normal to slight amount insane.  I wouldn't worry too much, but if you suddenly realize that you have become a hermit that can only speak pig-latin and animal-language and everyone is terrified of you, perhaps you should visit the doctor.

If you answered 10-15 as "yes":

I'm slightly worried for you.  Either you are insane, or slightly stupid.  Ask a really honest friend if you are slightly stupid.  If the answer is no, I urge you to visit a doctor.

If you answered 16-20 as "yes":

You are clinically insane.  Congratulations!  You are past the point of no return, so I'd just skip the doctor all together.  Instead, I would subscribe to my blog, considering you'd probably find quite a few commonalities with me.  Your insanity might also cause you to think my posts are strangely hysterical.

1 comment:

  1. I scored a 20/20. I think I am clinically INSANE!


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