Friday, July 1, 2011

Apparently Unicorns Aren't Masculine Enough.

I was always under the impression that unicorns secretly rocked everyone's world, and people who claimed they didn't like unicorns simply hadn't had the opportunity to truly discover the greatness of this mythical beast.

Apparently I was wrong.

There actually are people out there who hate unicorns.

I have one word to say to these people:  what?!

This small population of unicorn-haters mostly consists of male specimens.

I tried really hard to come up with a logical reason why guys would hate unicorns.  I decided that perhaps the main reason these males decided to hate on unicorns is because of the unicorns' reputation of being extremely feminine and slightly childish.  The poor guys are scared that liking unicorns will threaten their manliness!  I have brought it upon myself to prove these stereotypes wrong.


This is why:

Ok, so I guess a lot of the time I draw pink unicorns.  I understand that the color pink is girly, so perhaps this might give the wrong message to my readers; however, the reason why I always draw my unicorn as pink is because my pet unicorn IS pink.  Duh!  The thing is, unicorns don't have to be pink.  They can be any color.  They could be masculine colors too, like... um... well...

what the heck is a masculine color???

Ok, how about... blue.

Or..... camouflage?

Or.. um.. black and grey?

Wow.  Masculine colors suck.  No wonder I always make my unicorns pink.

Anyway, to further prove that unicorns are not masculine, I will refer to one of my first posts about a fight between a unicorn and a bear.  You can find it here.  This post is about a freakin' BATTLE between a BEAR and a UNICORN!!  Isn't this, like, exactly what guys like to talk about?  They come up with strange, bloody scenarios about some battle to the death that usually includes something about Chuck Norris, right?  Wow, I wish I had a brother.  I have no idea what I am talking about.

Let's move on.  Unicorns are NOT childish.  Nothing about violently impaling enemies or using magic to cure world hunger and starvation or crushing someone to death using hooves is G-rated.

So the point is, this blog is TOTALLY appropriate for guys, too.  It is not just for girls.
And, next time you come across someone who claims they hate unicorns, especially if it is a male, bring up the fact that unicorns could impale Chuck Norris in one blow.

1 comment:

  1. You are so right! Unicorns rock! I'm not a big fan of the masculine colors either (though I do like the blue one). :)


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